Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Vanilla's List

My list is simple.

!. My job. Not because I make a difference in peoples life or anything, it because they make a difference in mine with the crazy that comes out of their mouths on a daily basis. the following is an actual transcibed message left by a student on a co-workers voice mail. This was transcibed word for word by the care bear.

Ah, yes, this is Jane Doe, um, recall, uh, returning your call. Uh, I have a background as a speech and language therapist. Um, um, but I, I think, um, for, um, you know, financial control purposes in the state of California, I don’t know, I don’t think Bank of America would even allow me a separate safe deposit box. So, um, I’m wondering now that, um, that there’s been the death of my mother and my uncle and, I think, you know, at least a minimum of 5 million dollars went to Surprise, Arizona. I’m wondering if, um, if it would be possible to get employed anywhere. I-I’m on SSI right now and I’m trying to get back in to some form of work because I’m finding that the SSI is just a different biomedical behavioral controller nanotechnology experiment every two to three months or less. So I’m trying now that everybody’s gotten their money to maybe enable myself. If there’s any possibility of life in America , um, through, uh, job access and financial and health and transportation control. So, um, anyway, uh, I-I don’t know if, if this seems irrelevant to you, but it’s very relevant in terms of me being able if I’m going to be enable to study or whatever, because I go through a lot of teleportation implantation injection imbedding of-of, uh, things and also, I think withdrawal of blood. Um, so, um, anyway, I’m wondering if the medical and financial transportation communication education job exca-, access control is going to give me any access to anything. Um, all I can is my background is a speech and language therapist. There is a convention this year in, um, Florida to get continuing educations in the field of speech and language therapy. I always felt the field of speech and language therapy was a little bit narrow and I enjoyed teaching when I had an opportunity to substitute teach in California. I like the ancient Egypt , Greece , Rome , India , China , you know, Japan . Um, I like the ancient civilization. I like to study the ancient civilizations and I like to teach that kind of thing. Um, I don’t know, um, if you have any, um, opportunity for older women. I’m in my 50’s. Um, so, I don’t know if there’s any opportunity for continuing education or, or, if I should try to go the nursing route. But I feel like I need some form of employment, otherwise I’ll probably be dead shortly. Uh, due to the, um, research, um, and control that MediCal is. It’s just, it’s just a diagnosti – stistical manual code torture chamber of all the diagnosti –stistical manual codes to go through one after another like a little guinea pig or – or, um, hamster in a revolving cage. So, um, so I am trying to have an opportunity for continuing education. Um, and I-I don’t know if, um, there’s any, um, scholarships, uh, or any, um, any type of access toward the older woman. Um, there certainly isn’t here in Santa Cruz , California . So, um, due to the financial need of the community, the state, and (inaudible) my family. So, um, I need, um, some type of, um, job access, uh, with you know with maybe some continuing education on the side probably as soon as possible. And, um, that gives you a brief background on myself. Um, I was educated at the University of California at Santa Barbara and the University of New Mexico . I felt as though, um, in terms of education from my field I should have really have taken more chemistry or for the, um, the medical system these days. And, um, also, perhaps, um, medical terminology. But there’s also the problem, of, uh, nuclear, um, uh, for, uh, over, the-the-the Southwest region. And, um, s-so there’s, uh, other problems in terms of education, um, in terms of (inaudible) education the field of physics. So, um, but, um, that’s more of a long range perspective, um, over the Southwest region and that’s all I have to say at the moment. My number is xxx-xxx-xxxx extension xxx and right now there is some irritability medicine in my right arm that I’m going to have to try to get out some hydrogen peroxide gel. Due to, uh, the fact that the state of California is always trying to make me irritable. Ok, and thank you so much for calling. Bye.

2. Tacos - I them all in all their many forms

3. QT - I have yet to find anything wrong with the tizzzle. The only improvement that I could possible suggest would be and automatic doors and nice crystal light fixtures.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

WOW....that's quite a message, but even more interesting is the question of how much time it took Care Bear to transcribe it. I bet you love your job.

I bet you won't eat a fish taco, VG.

I ditto QT...I would improve it only by adding Sonic ice cubes..they're the best!

Anonymous said...

Did you mean something dirty by fish taco?

Anonymous said...

I thought there was something dirty in the fish taco comment too.

Also, I thought the QY DOES have the Sonic ice? Am I wrong? Someone help me out here.

And, "Crystal Light Fixture" at first sounds like VG really wants The Q to start displaying powdered iced tea. Just thought you'd like to know that.

Anonymous said...

QY=QT. I'm an idiot.

Anonymous said...

It took me about 45 minutes to transcribe that message. 45 glorious minutes. Sometimes a great message takes time.

Anonymous said...

I couldn't even read the whole message it was so crazy. I salute you're tenacity care bear.

Anonymous said...

oop, I meant YOUR tenacity, not you're tenacity.

Anonymous said...

Nay,

Just don't confuse QY and KY and you'll be okay!

Thanks, I'll be here all week. Don't forget to tip your waiter.

Anonymous said...

Nay, QT does have ice kind of like Sonic, but not as good. I think I am lost on the fish tacos.
Snippy