Friday, October 19, 2007

White Trash



It isn't that I don't love the culture chosen this week by Homer. It's just that I can't quite put my finger on what white trash actually is to me. Sometimes I think "Walmart, just go with Walmart", but then I realize there's so much more to it than that. Besides, sometimes I kind of like Walmart, you know, cos it's cheap, and they have those White Cloud diapers with John Lennon animals on them. And I'm not White Trash. (shut up, I'm not).

So then I think it's like, being super unaware of how gross you look. But I know just as many latinas and black women who wear spandex pants and oversized t-shirts with pink leopards on them. And Joy from My Name is Earl fame is SO White Trash, but she's not wearing gray sweatpants and sparkly silver Crocs. And contrarily-wise, I know plenty of men who wear AC/DC shirts and flannel and we all remember the Trucker Hat Phenomenon, and those guys aren't white trash. So, it can't totally be based on fashion.

So maybe, I'm thinking, it's how one behaves. Like seeing your big boobs and thinking, "I should be smashing beer cans with these things". Or yelling at your kids in the middle of the grocery store because they're opening beer bottles with their teeth and you haven't even paid for them yet, damnit. But we used to do some pretty uncouth things as kids, like when my sisters dug a hole in our backyard and filled it with water, and creating our very own "pool". And we weren't White Trash. (seriously, shut up).

So is White Trash The Bundy's or The Clampett's? Is it Larry the Cable Guy or is it Marshall Mathers? Britney Spears or The-Lady-Diane-Works-With?

I guess White Trashiness is a state of being not unlike pornography. You can't define it, but you know it when you see it.

-=Nay

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

You make some good points. White trash is just what we refer to people as when they do those things. Maybe we've just caught people in their most unfortunate of white trashy positions. It is the segment of our race that we're most ashamed of - no matter what that is.

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking that white trash is easily identified by a.) having been married to Pam Anderson at one point; b.) picking a fight with Tommy Lee in Vegas; c.) getting arrested for fighting at a Waffle House; and d.) being named Kid Rock. Just saying.

Homer said...

Gassy,

I told the exact, and I mean the exact, same thing to themo today when I read about Kid's Waffle House issues. Just entering a Waffle House earns you a free pass if you ever find yourself in a Deliverance moment.

Anonymous said...

Hold up. The Waffle House is an American gem. It's unbelievably tasty and the scenery is to die for. The Waffle House is also a trailblazer with regards to interior design. Waffle House executives wag their cocks and their middle fingers at the progression of fashion. Isn't that what America is all about?