Oh No You Di-int!

Homer, you had to tempt me.



Throw out another obscure threat and see what I come back with. Teach you to mess with your perverse little sister.

Gassy

Taylor the Latte Boy

I am sure that this post is going to get my vanblogger membership revoked, but I can't help myself. I love this song and wanted to share. I love it I love it I loooove it.



gassy

The Prince of Paris

I tend to stay away from the Celeb stuff. Big time 'who gives a shit' in my mind. I'd rather talk about the aforementioned retard parade. Also, I certainly tend to stay away from posting celeb stuff on the vanblogger because homer has the market cornered as far as that goes. But I thought this was funny. There's something magical about Prince...

Prince humiliated Paris Hilton by challenging her to sing live, it has been reported.

The legendary musician, who was performing at Las Vegas' Rio All Suite Hotel and Casino on April 21, invited Paris to join him on stage.

As Paris excitedly dashed up to meet the pop superstar, Prince handed her a microphone and allegedly said to the audience, "Lets see if she can really sing!"

According to Us Weekly magazine, an angry and humiliated Paris stormed off the stage and left the club minutes later.

Most Beautiful?

This is where I need to express some outrage. I know that for some reason or other, people find freaks of nature like Julia Roberts or Calista Flockhart attractive. I get that, not everyone is born with taste (either that or they burn it out of themselves with way too much crack), but it seems that every year People magazine needs to parade their collective lack of taste in front of the general public with their list of 50 most beautiful people. This year's covergirl? Not the lovely Ms. Beckinsale, or even the aforementioned Julia, but Drew Barrymore. That's right, Drew Barrymore.

I'm sorry, Drew Barrymore wouldn't be considered beautiful if she were on a bus populated trolls, deformed midgets, and rotting corpses. She would be moderately attractive among the freshly dead I guess, but that would be a judgment call. Put it this way, in a cast that includes Cameron Diaz, Drew is still considered the "ugly" Angel.

Maybe this is People's attempt to cash in on the whole Ugly Betty phenomenon, but really, I could have thrown a rock at the parade of freaks at my old school (themo and CB know what I'm talking about) and hit more attractive people. I really hope that Drew's publicist is getting the money that he or she is earning, because the devil is sure to get their soul for foisting this upon us.

Homer

The gayest thing I'VE ever seen

Gayer than Azis even. But that doesn't mean it's not awesome.

For those of you that have not seen all of the movie Xanadu, you are seriously missing out. ELO. ONJ. OMG!! I heart it. It's my fav. X 4 Life!

-=Nay

Inspiration

Some people use kick-ass posters to motivate them in their attempt to take over the world. I just use this.

Homer

More Azis

I can't begin explain my odd fascination with this guy. I think it's the fact that he clearly thinks he is the sexiest thing in the world even with that pot belly. -themo

America's Church Idol - Starring Heidi

American Church Idol

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Brunners have no shame. Complete now has some competition in Most Painful Performance to Sit All The Way Through. Yes, she does say, "I think I'm going to throw up" about halfway through the No Doubt song.

The gayest thing I've ever seen...

And that include the gay porn "Mercury Rising". This is some dude from Romania. All of his video's are this crazy. Thanks Perez for warping my innocent mind. -themo

Clark, the Canadian Hockey Goalie

Kind of gay, but I love it. -VG

Scratching Darth Vader

King of the nerds. - VG

Ahh, to be a Republican candidate for President...

You can actually hear people not voting for McCain here. Pretty cool.

Homer

Arrested Development Fans

This is obviously not going to be classic cinema, but it should be funny. I love this trailer, not just for the gratuitous use of a Van Halen song.

Homer

Perhaps some of you can relate? No? Yeah, I'm pretty lame...

This is a posting from my myspace blog tonight. It's so horrible, I knew I had to share it here too.

Subject: American Idol is all of a sudden interesting
Current mood: relieved and pathertic


I was watching American Idol tonight (shut up...) and totally recognized a guy they talked to on the streets. Except that I have no idea how I know him. Maybe he was in a popular web video? Maybe he was in that class I took about Postwar French and German Literature? Maybe I was behind him in line at the QT? Maybe he's my spirit guide?

Anyway, it was filmed in L.A., outside the Kodak Theater. He was tall and skinny, looked slightly Canadian, and sported Jesus-beard. How the heck do I find out why this guy is familar, before the image of him gets distorted beyond recognition? (His face is already starting to transform into a melding of Tom Green and James Caviezel). Who are you Mystery Opinionated-American-Idol-Fan-On-The-Street? Why do you haunt me so?

**UPDATED HOORAY!!

I just realized who it was. It's so not cool that I know this, but it was totally B.J., the second Hippie who won the 9th season of The Amazing Race. I have totally shamed myself and my family. Perhaps this No TV thing was a better idea than I thought, so that, you know, I don't start thinking reality stars are my long-lost friends. Wow.

Anyway, here's his picture. He's the dark-haired one, and not nearly as Canadian as I originally thought:

Landlord

To be honest, I read about this video on TMZ and wanted to check it out. When I went to the link the video didn't work. So I am embedding it here hoping that it works AND that it is good. If it sucks I don't want to hear your whining - just delete it.
gassy

**Edited to stop the auto-play**

Funny video though. Thanks Gassy!

William Shatner Common People live

Years ago when James Sharp came to visit he introduced me to Pulp and Blur. Loves of mine to this day. This is one of my favorite Pulp songs done in a spectacular way. Pay special attention to how Ben Folds raises the fire from the organ a la Hendrix. So awesome you'll probably pop a huge boner. Even if you are a chick.

The Greatest Band in the World

Van Halen? No. The Beatles? No. The Rolling Stones? No. Fat Randy? Getting closer. I know that it is nearly 30 minutes long, but it is soo worth it. Enjoy, at least give it 7 minutes, you'll thank me later.

Homer

She puts the ism in patriotism (never mind the smell)

A finer lyricist you will be hard pressed to find. I like the chorus.

Homer

I'm Going Off the Rails on a Crazy Train!

You know that Ozzy has a new album coming out when he starts doing press. He is looking remarkably sane here, what? That's not Ozzy? Oh, shit, that's Laverne? I always new Cindy Williams was hotter than Penny Marshall, but when you have turned into Ozzy's doppelganger, it is time to reassess your fashion values.

Homer

On a serious note...

This post is in honor of VG and CB's co-worker. PeTA has long been known as a fringe group of crazies, but they seem to really wanting to take their message to the masses. Their old campaigns used to feature scary, virus-ridden psuedo-celebrities, but these latest ads really bring home the plight of the poor animals used as meat and clothing. I'm going to continue supporting PeTA in this current phase of advertising while I eat some veal.

Homer

This is the Dawning of the age...

There's this vegetarian lady at work. She loves not shoving animals in her face almost as much as she loves shoving the fact that she's a vegetarian in your face. She told me yesterday that when she's driving around and smells hamburgers cooking, the smell of burning flesh makes her think of Auschwitz. I was like, "Word. 'Cause if there's nothing more than those dudes wanted than a Big Mac".

So it goes

Just a little English teacher moment for you all. Kurt Vonnegut died yesterday. He was an interesting writer and a strange guy, but his writing influenced many people. The world could use more writers who are willing to challenge their audience like Vonnegut, his take on the world around him will be missed.

Homer

A Serious Moment

On a serious note, the whole Don Imus thing has been beaten to death, but Jason Whitlock of the Kansas City Star wrote this article that tells it like it is. Enjoy the read, if you disagree with him, at least think about why.

Homer

Imus isn’t the real bad guy
Instead of wasting time on irrelevant shock jock, black leaders need to be fighting a growing gangster culture.
By JASON WHITLOCK
Columnist

Thank you, Don Imus. You’ve given us (black people) an excuse to avoid our real problem.

You’ve given Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson another opportunity to pretend that the old fight, which is now the safe and lucrative fight, is still the most important fight in our push for true economic and social equality.

You’ve given Vivian Stringer and Rutgers the chance to hold a nationally televised recruiting celebration expertly disguised as a news conference to respond to your poor attempt at humor.

Thank you, Don Imus. You extended Black History Month to April, and we can once again wallow in victimhood, protest like it’s 1965 and delude ourselves into believing that fixing your hatred is more necessary than eradicating our self-hatred.

The bigots win again.

While we’re fixated on a bad joke cracked by an irrelevant, bad shock jock, I’m sure at least one of the marvelous young women on the Rutgers basketball team is somewhere snapping her fingers to the beat of 50 Cent’s or Snoop Dogg’s or Young Jeezy’s latest ode glorifying nappy-headed pimps and hos.

I ain’t saying Jesse, Al and Vivian are gold-diggas, but they don’t have the heart to mount a legitimate campaign against the real black-folk killas.

It is us. At this time, we are our own worst enemies. We have allowed our youths to buy into a culture (hip hop) that has been perverted, corrupted and overtaken by prison culture. The music, attitude and behavior expressed in this culture is anti-black, anti-education, demeaning, self-destructive, pro-drug dealing and violent.

Rather than confront this heinous enemy from within, we sit back and wait for someone like Imus to have a slip of the tongue and make the mistake of repeating the things we say about ourselves.

It’s embarrassing. Dave Chappelle was offered $50 million to make racially insensitive jokes about black and white people on TV. He was hailed as a genius. Black comedians routinely crack jokes about white and black people, and we all laugh out loud.

I’m no Don Imus apologist. He and his tiny companion Mike Lupica blasted me after I fell out with ESPN. Imus is a hack.

But, in my view, he didn’t do anything outside the norm for shock jocks and comedians. He also offered an apology. That should’ve been the end of this whole affair. Instead, it’s only the beginning. It’s an opportunity for Stringer, Jackson and Sharpton to step on victim platforms and elevate themselves and their agenda$.

I watched the Rutgers news conference and was ashamed.

Martin Luther King Jr. spoke for eight minutes in 1963 at the March on Washington. At the time, black people could be lynched and denied fundamental rights with little thought. With the comments of a talk-show host most of her players had never heard of before last week serving as her excuse, Vivian Stringer rambled on for 30 minutes about the amazing season her team had.

Somehow, we’re supposed to believe that the comments of a man with virtually no connection to the sports world ruined Rutgers’ wonderful season. Had a broadcaster with credibility and a platform in the sports world uttered the words Imus did, I could understand a level of outrage.

But an hourlong press conference over a man who has already apologized, already been suspended and is already insignificant is just plain intellectually dishonest. This is opportunism. This is a distraction.

In the grand scheme, Don Imus is no threat to us in general and no threat to black women in particular. If his words are so powerful and so destructive and must be rebuked so forcefully, then what should we do about the idiot rappers on BET, MTV and every black-owned radio station in the country who use words much more powerful and much more destructive?

I don’t listen or watch Imus’ show regularly. Has he at any point glorified selling crack cocaine to black women? Has he celebrated black men shooting each other randomly? Has he suggested in any way that it’s cool to be a baby-daddy rather than a husband and a parent? Does he tell his listeners that they’re suckers for pursuing education and that they’re selling out their race if they do?

When Imus does any of that, call me and I’ll get upset. Until then, he is what he is — a washed-up shock jock who is very easy to ignore when you’re not looking to be made a victim.

No. We all know where the real battleground is. We know that the gangsta rappers and their followers in the athletic world have far bigger platforms to negatively define us than some old white man with a bad radio show. There’s no money and lots of danger in that battle, so Jesse and Al are going to sit it out.

Another Kicking Movie

This is sure to be the early frontrunner for the Oscar next March. Words cannot describe the fear and entertainment that this movie inspires. Enjoy!




Homer

In The Satellite Rides The Star

Music today has a black belt in sucking. Good thing the Old 97's aren't even in karate class. Here's a slow jam from what could be the best band around. In my top three for sure. Enjoy.

How To Get There

1. go to www.google.com
2. click on "maps"
3. click on "get directions"
4. type "New York" in the first box (the "from" box)
5. type "London" in the second box (the "to" box)
6. scroll down to step #23

-=Nay

Get'yo thin on

I'm thinking about doing a diet along with my nightly running. Would anybody want to join me? I don't know what to do for a diet. I may do something low-key, or I may consider an all out disciplined approach. Either way, I'm up for suggestions and would like to see if anyone would like to join me. Who's in?

Care Bear